What is Social-Emotional Learning? Neurodiversity-Affirming Approaches for SLPs

Social-emotional learning (SEL) has gained substantial recognition in recent years for its value in fostering resilience, empathy, self-awareness, and interpersonal skills. For speech-language pathologists (SLPs), integrating SEL can enhance client outcomes and support neurodivergent as well as neurotypical individuals in unique, individualized ways. This post will guide you through what social-emotional learning is, why it matters in therapy, and how you can adopt neurodiversity-affirming approaches in your practice to empower your clients and create a space for emotional understanding and awareness tailored to their needs.

Understanding Social-Emotional Learning 

At its core, SEL involves developing skills that help individuals understand and communicate emotions, set goals, perspective-take (for self and others), self-advocate, develop meaningful relationships, and make responsible decisions. When implemented thoughtfully, SEL can strengthen a client’s communication, interpersonal skills, and self-esteem. Research has shown that SEL benefits individuals of all ages and backgrounds, providing tools for lifelong success and well-being.

A neurodiversity-affirming approach to SEL ensures that the learning environment is respectful, inclusive, and tailored to each client's needs.

From personal experience, effective SEL often comes into play when it appears that a client feels misunderstood or overwhelmed by expectations that don’t match their needs. For example, I had a client who had difficulty labeling emotions in the “traditional fashion” but thrived when we shifted the focus to exploring what certain feelings felt like in their body—like a “tight chest” when nervous or “jumpy stomach” when excited. That small adjustment helped them connect their internal experiences with language in a way that promoted more authenticity and empowerment.

For many individuals, SEL can sometimes feel overwhelming or, when presented traditionally, may not resonate with their unique experiences and perspectives. A neurodiversity-affirming approach to SEL ensures that the learning environment is respectful, inclusive, and tailored to each client's needs. Rather than focusing solely on compliance or “social norms,” this approach centers on authentic self-expression and encourages clients to understand their emotions and reactions within their unique frameworks.

Why SLPs Should Consider Social-Emotional Learning  in Speech Therapy

SLPs have a unique opportunity to foster SEL skills because communication and social interactions are deeply intertwined with emotional well-being. For many clients, especially those who are autistic, have ADHD, or other neurodivergent identities, SEL can aid in managing challenges around social communication, flexibility, and emotional regulation. By integrating SEL, SLPs can help clients build skills that not only support speech and language goals but also enhance their confidence and self-determination. So what can this implementation actually look like?

In speech therapy, social-emotional learning skills might involve (but are not limited to):

• Recognizing and labeling emotions, both in oneself and others (see more below*)
• Learning self-regulation techniques to manage stress or anxiety
• Building awareness and communicating personal boundaries
• Developing self-advocacy skills, e.g., assertive communication
• Practicing perspective-taking in social interactions
• Compromising and conflict resolution

When these skills are taught in a neurodiversity-affirming way, clients are not pressured to conform to rigid standards. Instead, they’re encouraged to understand their emotional responses in ways that are empowering and personally meaningful.

*Why a Flexible Approach to Teaching Emotions Can Make All the Difference

A single, “traditional” approach to teaching emotions—like focusing solely on identifying happy, sad, or angry faces—can limit a client’s ability to fully understand and express their own complex feelings. Sometimes, this approach can be helpful for general understanding - but it would be remiss to say this captures the entire picture. Emotions are nuanced, and everyone (neurotypical and neurodivergent individuals) experiences and interprets them differently. By moving beyond the basics of emotions and introducing a variety of tools and strategies, we can support clients in recognizing a wider range of internal states, understanding their unique emotional experiences, and developing personalized ways to manage them. This flexible approach fosters a deeper, more authentic emotional awareness and helps clients develop skills that truly resonate with their individual needs!

5 Neurodiversity-Affirming Social-Emotional Strategies for SLPs

Incorporating SEL in a neurodiversity-affirming way means recognizing and valuing the unique ways each client experiences and expresses their emotions. Here are some tips on integrating SEL in a respectful and adaptable manner:

Focus on Emotion Self-Identification Over Social Expectations

Rather than emphasizing “appropriate” emotions, begin with self-identifying and understanding their emotions. Encourage clients to name their feelings (e.g., "I feel frustrated when I don't get the bus home from school") and notice how these emotions manifest in their bodies (e.g., "When I feel frustrated, my face feels hot"). This foundational work empowers them to recognize their experiences without judgment and learn strategies to communicate them more effectively.

Use Visual Supports and Multi-Sensory Techniques

A client who loved art thrived when we created an “emotion wheel” using their favorite colors and textures. Visual emotion charts, calming tools, or breathing exercises can similarly help clients connect with their emotional states in a way that feels personalized and accessible.

Emphasize Self-Awareness and Self-Advocacy

I’ve found that teaching clients how to ask for a break or say, “I need help,” can be life-changing. It fully puts them into the driver's seat for communicating and regulating in an assertive, effective manner. These small but powerful self-advocacy tools can empower clients to navigate social situations on their own terms.

Integrate Flexible, Non-Prescriptive Role-Playing Activities

A favorite for groups! Role-playing scenarios can help clients explore social dynamics without rigid scripts. Encourage open-ended discussions and exploration, such as, “How might you feel in this situation?” or “What could you say if you felt uncomfortable?” This fosters adaptability and confidence while giving peers an opportunity to model and observe different emotional perspectives.

Celebrate Progress in Terms of Personal Growth, Not Social Conformity

A teenage client once told me, “I don’t have to like talking to everyone; I just want to feel okay doing it.” That was their win, and it was something to celebrate. Recognize achievements like improved self-awareness, greater comfort in communication, or confidence in expressing needs, even if they don’t always match conventional milestones.

Practical Social-Emotional Learning Activities for Therapy Sessions

Looking to incorporate social-emotional learning in your sessions? We're offering a Self-Advocacy Bingo freebie—perfect for helping clients practice asking for help, setting boundaries, and using calming strategies in a fun, engaging way. You can download it (and many other freebies) by joining our FREE Open Community, here.

Integrating SEL into your therapy sessions doesn’t have to be complex. Here are a few adaptable activities that promote SEL in a neurodiversity-affirming way:

• Emotional Check-In Cards: Start sessions by having clients select an emotion card that represents how they feel. Encourage a brief discussion about their choice to help them practice identifying and expressing their feelings.
• Coping Strategies Match-Up: Create a matching game where clients pair emotions like “stressed” or “excited” with effective coping strategies (e.g., “take three deep breaths” for stress). This reinforces managing emotions in a structured, supportive way.
• Self-Advocacy Bingo: Engage clients in a game of bingo that includes actions like “express my opinion,” “use assertive communication,” or “choose a coping skill and use it.” This activity makes self-advocacy fun and rewarding, building confidence in expressing needs. Get your free download in our Open Community!
• Strengths Backpack: Have clients fill a “strengths backpack” by drawing or listing personal strengths, qualities, or achievements they’re proud of. This visual reminder boosts self-esteem and encourages resilience by reminding clients of their unique strengths.
• Positive Affirmation Cards: Work with clients to make a set of positive affirmations, like “I am capable” or “I can handle tough situations.” These cards serve as personal encouragement they can refer to outside of therapy.

⭐ Looking for more SEL resources? Find them in our Premium Community!

Find even more neurodiversity-affirming SEL tools when you join our Premium Community! As a member, you can instantly access ALL SEL resources and over $1000 worth of digital therapy resources (including designated neurodiversity-affirming & social-emotional resource spaces), research summaries, community forums, and more.

References/further resources

Cherewick, M., & Matergia, M. (2024). Neurodiversity in practice: A conceptual model of autistic strengths and potential mechanisms of change to support positive mental health and wellbeing in autistic children and adolescents. Advances in Neurodevelopmental Disorders, 8(3), 408–422. https://doi.org/10.1007/s41252-023-00348-z

Gaddy, C., & Crow, H. (2023). A primer on neurodiversity-affirming speech and language services for autistic individuals. Perspectives of the ASHA Special Interest Groups, 8(6), 1220-1237.

Rangel-Rodríguez, G. A., Martín, M. B., Blanch, S., & Wilkinson, K. M. (2021). The early development of emotional competence profile: A means to share information about emotional status and expression by children with complex communication needs. American Journal of Speech-Language Pathology, 30(2), 551-565. Retrieved from https://pubs.asha.org/doi/10.1044/2020_AJSLP-20-00209

Yu, B., & Sterponi, L. (2023). Toward neurodiversity: How conversation analysis can contribute to a new approach to social communication assessment. Language, Speech, and Hearing Services in Schools, 54(1), 27-41. Retrieved from https://pubs.asha.org/doi/10.1044/2022_LSHSS-22-00041